There are moments in leadership when a sentence, a poem, or a conversation lands so deeply that it lingers-quietly rearranging something inside you. Two such lines found me at very different points in my life, yet they felt like they were speaking directly to each other.
Virginia Woolf once wrote: “No need to hurry. No need to sparkle. No need to be anybody but oneself.”
And then, years later, Shel Silverstein offered this deceptively simple truth: “She had blue skin, And so did he. He kept it hid, And so did she… They searched for blue Their whole life through, Then passed right by and never knew.”
Both quotes capture the same core tension modern leaders wrestle with: We want impact, trust, connection, and followership, yet so many leaders still hide the very qualities that would make those things possible.
The Leadership Blind Spot We Don’t Talk About
In the past 20 years of working with executives, emerging leaders and HR directors across industries, one insight has become impossible to ignore:
You cannot lead authentically if you haven’t first met yourself. That’s not soft. It’s strategic. Because when leaders lack clarity about who they are - their values, triggers, beliefs, strengths, blind spots, and aspirations - they default to performance mode. They lead from masks, not meaning.
And here’s the consequence HR sees every day:
- Teams mistrust what feels inconsistent.
- Performance conversations become mechanical rather than developmental.
- Collaboration becomes surface-level.
- Talent leaves - not from workload, but from disconnection.
Authenticity isn’t a personality trait. It’s a leadership competency. One that directly impacts engagement, psychological safety, culture, and retention.
Why Authentic Leaders Build Stronger Organisations
1. They lead from values, not volatility. Self-aware leaders don’t react from insecurity; they respond from alignment.
2. They build teams based on complementary strengths, not comfort. They don’t need clones-they want capability.
3. They create a culture where people feel safe to think, challenge, and grow. And this isn’t just philosophical. Google’s multi-year Project Aristotle found that psychological safety- people feeling safe enough to be themselves - is the strongest predictor of high-performing teams. Authentic leaders are the ones who make that possible.
4. They connect personal purpose with organisational purpose. And when a leader is aligned, their team feels it. Engagement stops being an initiative and becomes a natural response.
In every leadership development program we run, one truth becomes evident within the first few days: When leaders bring more of who they truly are, organisations get more of what they actually need. Less hiding. More clarity. Stronger relationships. Better decisions. Greater performance.
The Cost of Hiding the Blue
Silverstein’s poem still hits me in the chest. Two people - searching for alignment, belonging, connection - walk right past each other because neither is willing to be seen.
Now imagine this happening inside your company every day:
A high-potential leader holding back their ideas.Silverstein’s poem still hits me in the chest. Two people - searching for alignment, belonging, connection - walk right past each other because neither is willing to be seen.
Authenticity isn’t about oversharing or being unfiltered. It’s about being integrated - the same person on the inside as the one you present on the outside.
The leaders who do this well create environments where other people can bring their “blue,” too. And that is the foundation of a high-performance culture.
As we close out the year, perhaps the real work is not becoming more of anything - more polished, more impressive, more perfect. Perhaps the real work is un-becoming everything you thought you needed to be in order to lead. Because leadership begins long before strategy, influence, or capability. Leadership begins with self.
So here is the invitation:
Stop hiding the blue.
Let yourself be seen.
Lead from who you already are - not who you think you “should” be.
Your team, your organisation, and your own impact will be stronger for it.
Executive & Leadership Reflection Questions
(For HR Directors: consider sharing these in your next leadership development cohort.)
- Which parts of my identity or leadership style do I downplay because they don’t fit the traditional “leader mold”?
- Where in my role do I feel the greatest sense of alignment—and where do I feel the greatest tension? What does that reveal?
- Which values have guided my best decisions this year, and how consistently am I leading from them?
- How might my team or organisation benefit if I showed more of my authentic strengths - and acknowledged my developmental edges with more openness?
- If I trusted that who I am is already enough, what might change in the way I lead, communicate, and build relationships?
If this topic resonates - and you’re exploring how to develop more authentic, self-aware, effective leaders across your organisation - I’d love to continue the conversation.
Creating leaders at every level.
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